Puns - love 'em or hate 'em?

© Njnightsky | Dreamstime

OK - I know the country is divided between those of us who love puns, and those who can't stand them.

Well - if you hate them, look away now! You have been warned.

And if, like me, you're a pun lover, read on for a chuckle - and maybe the odd groan or two...

Enjoy!

“I’ve been spending too much on pet birds recently – I’ve gone way over budgie…”

“To print out this article about bladder weakness, simply press ‘Control’ ‘P’”

“Have you heard about the investor that made his fortune by selling his shares in spaghetti sauce and investing in biscuits instead? It’s a classic ragus to rich teas story.”

“Don’t buy alphabetti spaghetti in France – it doesn’t taste the same with French letters in it!”

“There’s a great new relaxation and meditation place where you’re only allowed to use 140 characters of speech over the whole weekend – it’s called a ‘re-tweet’

“I’ve been asked to speak at a nudist camp next weekend. I can’t do it because I’ve got something on.”

“I’d love to get a job as a nit nurse – it’s a job that boxes all the ticks!”

“Sale now on at the magic shop – buy wand, get wand free!”

“The rules of the superglue club may be very strict, but everyone sticks to them.

“I went to a swingers’ party – it was wife changing!”